School holidays are awesome!

Today Max and I made a wonderful marble run at the bottom of my garden. It’s muddy down there so we built a mud mountain and then made twisting tracks all the way down. At the bottom we dug a tunnel that went along under the compost heap and came up on the lawn the other side. It was fantastic. Our marbles got such a run up down the mountain that they shot through the tunnel and sped on to the grass. My favourite marble – The Blue Wonder was the best. It went the furthest every time. Its record run was getting as far as the apple tree and that’s a long way across the grass!
We were just setting up for a double run which is two marbles racing each other when there was a loud Boo! I was so frightened I jumped and sat in the mud and Max dropped all his marbles.
Guess who it was! Yes, the gargoylz had come to see us and of course they had to play a trick on us. It was Eli, Theo and Abel. They were really impressed with our marble mountain and joined in the fun.
Then disaster! We heard a horrible moany voice and Arabella appeared. The gargoylz had to hide quickly. Eli turned into a snake and slithered under the compost, Theo turned into a kitten and Abel became a tree. When Arabella saw what we were doing she wanted to join in. I said no, but then she started yelling for Mum and Mum said we had to let her play.
Arabella only wanted to play to annoy us. Normally she says she’s too grown up for that sort of thing. Anyway she started bossing us about straight away. It really ruined the game especially when she demanded that she should have The Blue Wonder as she is the oldest. So I told her she couldn’t have it as it was mine. She stamped her foot and shouted and then told us that she didn’t want to play anyway and that we’d be sorry. She bent down by the tunnel to tie up her shoe and then she stalked off to the house.
Max and I cheered and the gargoylz came out of hiding. But when I sent the Blue Wonder down for its next run it didn’t come out of the tunnel. We tried to peer inside but we couldn’t see it. I was really upset. My favourite, record-breaking marble was stuck.
Lucky for me that I have a friend who can make himself tunnel-shaped. Eli turned back into a snake and shot down the tunnel to see what the problem was. He was soon out the other side with the Blue Wonder. And now we could see what had happened. There was a big lump of sticky chewing gum on my marble. Arabella must have poked the chewing gum down the tunnel with a stick when she tied up her shoe. She must have known that the next marble would run into it and then get stuck in the tunnel and that would be the end of our game.
So it’s time to plan a super trick to get Arabella back!

Categories: News
Tags: Abel Arabella Ben Eli Max Theo tricks

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We played such a cool trick on the girls and our mums on the royal wedding day – thanks to Abel. They did deserve it.  When Max and I asked very politely if we could watch our DVD they all shouted NO and Jessica stuck her tongue out.

Then we heard ‘boyz!’ hissed through the letterbox and when we looked, Toby and Abel were peeping out of a bush in the front garden.  They sneaked in and Abel slipped into the lounge. The girls and our mums had just got really gooey about lovely wedding dresses – yuck – when Arabella screamed. She told them that the plant in the corner had winked at her. The others didn’t believe her but then Jessica said it was waving at her and showing its teeth. Max’s mum just turned up the volume but then my mum gave a shriek and said there was a twiggy monster in the pot. Max’s mum looked but Abel had ducked down out of sight.

The mums then came looking for us because they were sure that we’d played a trick on them.  Luckily Max and I had thought about this so we made sure we were helping his dad out in the garden. They had to agree it couldn’t have been us and that they’d all be much happier watching it back at my house so off they all went. Result! Max and I got to watch our film in his lounge in peace!  And his dad made us some popcorn. He was amazed how quickly we ate it but he didn’t realise that we had five hungry gargoylz hiding behind the couch. Once they’d heard how well the trick had gone, Barney, Neb and Theo had come to join Toby and Abel.  It was a bit of a squash.

So it was an awesome Royal Wedding day for us.

Now we’re just off to drop a wet sponge on Arabella’s head from the bedroom window.  She’s been complaining we smell because we don’t wash enough and she says she just loves washing all the time.  So we’re going to give her an extra rinse and see how she likes that.

Categories: News
Tags: Abel Arabella Barney Ben Max Neb royal Theo Toby Wedding

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Our party hats started off okay. I went round to Max’s house on Saturday and found that Jelly, Neb, Barney and Ira were already there, helping Max to get out all the paper and glue and stuff that we needed. We decided to make pirate hats.  We’d just got our cardboard into cool pirate hat shapes when Max’s mum called us for a snack.  When we got back (bringing cookies for our friends, of course) we found a terrible mess and not a gargoyle in sight. The hats were covered in dead leaves, old socks and toilet paper!  And so was the furniture. Then Barney, Neb and Ira popped out of the wardrobe and yelled ‘surprise’! They thought we’d be pleased. When we complained about the hats, Ira told us that he knew all about olden day pirates and they always looked a bit messy. Then we heard Jelly calling for help. He’d turned into a ball of purple goo and was stuck to the top of Max’s hat. When we’d peeled him off and he’d gone back to normal he explained he wanted to be there when Mrs Hogsbum gave his hat the prize.

We felt really stupid at the party in our hats. I had one of Max’s football socks dangling in my face and he had toilet paper over one eye. We wanted to take our hats off but Mrs Hogsbum said we’d be breaking school rule number 961 – boys must not take party hats off at Christmas parties. And then it was brilliant because we won the prize for the funniest hats!

Then Abel played the most awesome Christmas trick on Mrs Hogsbum. He waited until she was making her rounds of the school at lunchtime and transformed into a Christmas tree, complete with baubles and tinsel. He took up the whole corridor. We were just coming along and saw Mrs Hogsbum going red in the face with steam blowing out of her ears. Unfortunately she spotted us and thought we’d done it. She told us we’d broken school rule number 962 – boys must not block the corridor with Christmas trees. The moment she’d gone, Abel turned back into his normal self, scampered round to overtake her and turned into a tree again. She couldn’t understand how the tree kept moving and in the end she thought she must be going mad and went home. Result!

Now we’ve got two whole weeks off for Christmas!

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Barney Ben Christmas Ira Jelly Max Mrs Hogsbum Neb

6

Nan’s cakes were the best cakes in the history of best cakes. The only trouble was, she didn’t make enough of them. Well, she wasn’t to know that ten of our gargoyle friends would sneak along to her house with us and try to eat the lot. Ben and I only got three each because every time she went out of the room to get us more drinks the gargoylz popped in and snatched more.

We went back to my house afterwards. It was quite misty and the gargoylz ran along the pavement with us and no one could see them properly. One man thought we were walking a load of dogs when he saw all the little shapes scuttling along with us in the mist. Then he spotted Toby flying overhead. We told him we were walking the parrot too.

When we got home, Jessica came running out shrieking that everywhere was ‘mystery’. We knew she meant misty, but it gave us an idea for a trick. (She’s been really horrible as she wasn’t allowed to go to Nan’s with us.) We said we’d go out into the back garden with her and investigate the mystery. Then Max got the gargoylz to hide all round the flowerbeds and in the trees. Jessica followed us outside and yelped.  She said there was an ugly thing waving its nose at her from a bush. We had a look. It was Neb, of course, but we told Jessica it was just a twig. Then she said she could see a nasty-looking monster with long hair sitting on the roof. That was Eli, wiggling his snakes. Then the branch of a big tree bent over and tapped Jessica on the back. She nearly deafened us yelling that the tree was alive and coming to get her. We knew it was Abel in his tree form.

Mum told us not to tease Jessica and wouldn’t listen when we said it wasn’t us. Anyway, tomorrow we’ve got to bake some cakes for Jessica. Not fair.  I wonder what we can put in them so she won’t be too keen on eating them. Hmmmm…

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Ben Eli Gargoylz Jessica Max Neb Toby

7

The church firework display last Friday was THE BEST EVER, although we thought we were going to miss the whole thing, thanks to Theo.  Ben and I got to the churchyard before anyone else was there and went off to find the gargoylz. We could hear them rustling about in the grass and see them rushing about on the roof but they didn’t seem to notice us.  Suddenly Zack appeared with a pop in front of us. “Can’t find Theo… all looking for him,” he panted. Then he disappeared. Next Toby flew down in a flap and told us that Theo is so scared of fireworks that he hides every year and the gargoylz always miss the display as they’re too busy looking for him. 

We joined in the search. People were starting to arrive in the churchyard now and some of them tutted when they saw us crawling about among the graves. (They soon backed off when we told them we were looking for our pet tarantula!) Just before the display was going to begin we heard a little miaow from Ben’s backpack. Theo had jumped in there. He looked terrified and wanted us to take him away.

Then I had my brainwave. We got Abel to turn into a really bushy tree and got Theo to climb up into his branches. Theo felt safe curled up there with Abel’s leaves all around him in a sort of nest.  The other gargoylz got on the roof for the best view – after they’d eaten all the hot dogs that the vicar had brought out for the children.  (His wife made some more so it was okay.)

The fireworks were great. We oo-ed and ah-ed for ages and the last one lit up the whole sky. After that, all us kids were given sparklers and we wrote our names in the air. All of a sudden someone shouted that there were children on the church roof. We looked up and Ben and I had to stop ourselves laughing.  The whole roof was sparkling with sparklers. Some seemed to be running up and down the spire. Then Lucinda Tellingly gave a shriek and said there was a kitten in a tree, waving a sparkler.  Luckily no one believed her! 

Oh dear. Mrs Hogsbum is coming into the classroom. I think I can guess why. Ben and I made a working model of a Catherine wheel for the hall display. Unfortunately it went off accidentally at lunchtime and sprayed glitter all over the mashed potato. Well, it wasn’t me or Ben that set it off, but I think I know who it might have been!

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Ben fireworks Lucinda Max Mrs Hogsbum Theo Toby Zack

5

Halloween was super spooky!  Max dressed as a mummy with blood-soaked bandages (tomato sauce) and I was a zombie, with my face painted green. When our friends arrived in their awesome costumes we set off to go trick-a-treating.  Mum took us – and we only went to people we knew of course. It was awesome!  (Even though Jessica insisted on being dressed as a pink princess.)  Theo thought he was being a fierce ghostly tiger but could only manage a sweet little kitten!  Everyone loved our costumes – especially the skeleton at the back of the line. That was Rufus if you hadn’t guessed.  Abel came as well and kept turning into different trees and shaking his branches at everyone. We came back with lots of goodies.

Then we played games. Max is the best at apple bobbing although his bandages got very wet.  He said he was an underwater mummy!  We put a bowl of water and some apples out in the garden for the gargoylz to play too where no one would see them. They spluttered so loudly that Mum and Dad thought the drains were playing up. Then we had a ghastly ‘pass the parcel’ with sets of vampire teeth in each layer.

Max’s mum cooked little sausages and Max and I had done our spaghetti and mozzarella and we all pretended they were ghouls’ fingers, guts, and eyeballs!  Max’s mum had made a chocolate cake that looked like a coffin.  It was scrumptious.  She was surprised to find it had all gone when she went to put the leftovers away.  Rufus, Theo and Abel all had very chocolatey stone faces when they went home.

Then we told each other ghost stories!  Max told the best one. A boy was going home through the dark graveyard when he heard a tapping noise. He was really scared until he came across a man, chiselling away at one of the tombstones. “Oh,” he said in relief. “I didn’t know anyone worked here this late.” The man shook his head. “I don’t work here. I’m just sorting this out.” He pointed to the tombstone. “They’ve spelt my name wrong, you see.”

Do you get it?  At least the gargoylz weren’t scared to go home to their graveyard.

Got to dash now. We’re off the church fireworks display. Bet the Gargoylz will be watching.

Categories: Gargoylz, jokes
Tags: Abel Ben fireworks Gargoylz Halloween Max Rufus Theo

2

My world record is safe.  Max could only find two satsumas and a pear and when he added a dried raisin he found behind the fridge, the whole thing collapsed.

The gargoylz played a trick on us yesterday!  After school, we dashed round to the churchyard to see them because we wanted to tell them that half term started today and we’d have a whole week off school to play with them.  And most importantly, we needed to start making plans for Halloween.

But the gargoylz were nowhere to be seen.  The church roof was empty.  We walked up and down but all we could see were piles of leaves that had been swept up.  We even knocked on all the tree trunks to see if they were really Abel in disguise.  It was beginning to get dark and we needed to get home.

Then suddenly there was a roar and every pile of leaves erupted like mini volcanoes.  It was all the gargoylz!  Max and I jumped and yelled in fright.  It was a cool trick. 

And we decided to try it on Arabella tonight because she had been really bossy at lunchtime today and stopped us having third helpings of chocolate sponge. She’s the bossiest monitor in the history of bossiest monitors.  She had a humungous moan at us and all we’d done was ask for I’d given Mrs Simmer my best smile and as usual it had worked.  She’d got two huge slices of cake ready on her ladle and hovering over our plates when my bossy older sister ruined it for us by telling all the dinner ladies we were greedy and didn’t deserve it.

So we went straight home from the churchyard and made a huge pile of leaves in my garden.  We’re going to hide in it the moment I’ve finished this blog.  Arabella is watching TV in the living room so Theo is going to change into a cute kitten and appear at the window. Then he’s going to lure Arabella over to our trap.  She’s going to be so scared!

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Arabella Ben Max tricks

2

‘Be a Chimp’ was the most awesome place in the history of most awesome places.  It was a mega big course up in the trees, with rope ladders and Tarzan swings and best of all, great long zip wires!

And the great thing was Abel and Jelly came too.  The bad thing was so did Arabella! – Luckily Jessica’s too small.  I don’t know why she bothered. She did nothing but shriek and hold everyone else up when she got scared.  If that wasn’t bad enough she tried to tell us how to do it.  The helper had to hoist her up the Tarzan net because she couldn’t climb it.  Max and I got ahead of her but then my dad said we had to wait until she caught up!  And then when she did she was really bossy.  So we made a plan.  We told Arabella that there were pterodactyls in the trees.  Of course she didn’t believe us.

When she was going across the wobbly bridge Jelly popped up in front of her.  That should have been enough to scare her but she just said that Jelly was a cheap plastic model!  He was very offended.

So then we told her that the trees were haunted.  She stuck her tongue out at us.  But she doesn’t know about Abel.  He turned into a tree and when she climbed up him, he growled, ‘Watch out!  My bite’s worse than my bark!’

Arabella screeched, scrambled along the stirrups and down the next zip wire in record time.  After that, she insisted on sticking close to Dad.  Max and I were free.

Tonight I’m going to put some twigs in her pants drawer so she’ll think the ghostly tree has come home with us.

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Adventure Arabella assault course Jelly Pranks

3

Miss Bleet nearly saw our blog last week.  Just in time, Max fell off his chair and pretended he’d broken his nose so she forgot all about the tea cosies – whatever they are.

The Harvest Festival was nearly a disaster, thanks to the gargoylz!  When we told them about the food collection, they all rubbed their tummies and said it sounded like a nice feast.  We told them that the food was for the old people and they promised to leave it alone but when Max and I went to add our tins of spaghetti hoops to the pile we found that everything had been opened and scoffed.  We knew it was the gargoylz because there was a trail of custardy claw prints leading to the window.

And then we heard Mrs Hogsbottom coming.  (She was yelling at some infants and the sound was getting louder and louder.)  We quickly wiped away the prints and covered the mess with our new tins just as she came in.  She looked at us suspiciously and went on her way.  We knew we were in big trouble.  The moment she discovered the food had been eaten, she’d blame us because she’d seen us there.

We went to find the gargoylz and gave them a telling off.  They said they were very sorry but the food had looked so nice that they couldn’t resist. They told us they would sort it all out.

And they did!  Barney sneaked into the vicar’s kitchen and made muffins and cookies.  They were strange shapes and a bit burnt because Azzan helped him by breathing fire but he made loads and put them on pretty plates.  Then Abel and Eli carried all the food from the vicar’s larder into the school hall to replace the things that the gargoylz had eaten.  The next time Mrs Hogsbum checked on the display it was bursting with food and Max and I were safe.

We felt a bit sorry for the vicar because Miss Bleet recognised the plates and told him off for burning the cookies!

I can hear Arabella screeching from her bedroom.  I think she might have found the fake dog poo I put on her carpet.

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Arabella Azzan Barney Ben Eli Gargoylz Harvest Festival Max Miss Bleet Mrs Hogsbum Pranks vicar

3

Barney’s home and has told us all about his holiday.  It turns out that the Leaning Tower wasn’t made of pizza after all.  It was a proper tower in Pisa that leans.  He didn’t realise until he’d got to the top and took a big bite out of the stone!   It gave him such a fright that he made one of his smells and Mrs Hogsbum got the blame!  All the tourists had to hold their noses and the guide asked Mrs Hogbum to leave.  She shouted outrageous and told them they’d broken holiday rule number 754 – No one tells a head teacher to leave a leaning tower. 

There was an animal fun day at the church yesterday in aid of the donkey sanctuary down the road.  The vicar dressed up as a kangaroo and bounced around giving out sweets from his pouch – until Zack got inside and scoffed the lot.  Ben and I went as a giant cockroach and scared Doris and Aggie, the demon flower arrangers.

Theo turned into a kitten and won first prize for his costume.  The vicar thought he was a small child.  Our new friend Abel had transformed into a tree and was having a snooze when the vicar’s wife pinned a treasure hunt clue to his trunk.  He soon woke up and changed the wording so that all the treasure hunters ended up in the pond!  It was a great day and the donkeys are now going to have new ear warmers for winter.

Mum’s calling me.  She says it’s Ben on the phone and he’s got an awesome surprise for me.

Categories: Enemy agents, Gargoylz, Pranks
Tags: Abel Barney Ben holiday Max Mrs Hogsbum Theo vicar Zack

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