Today Max and I made a wonderful marble run at the bottom of my garden. It’s muddy down there so we built a mud mountain and then made twisting tracks all the way down. At the bottom we dug a tunnel that went along under the compost heap and came up on the lawn the other side. It was fantastic. Our marbles got such a run up down the mountain that they shot through the tunnel and sped on to the grass. My favourite marble – The Blue Wonder was the best. It went the furthest every time. Its record run was getting as far as the apple tree and that’s a long way across the grass!
We were just setting up for a double run which is two marbles racing each other when there was a loud Boo! I was so frightened I jumped and sat in the mud and Max dropped all his marbles.
Guess who it was! Yes, the gargoylz had come to see us and of course they had to play a trick on us. It was Eli, Theo and Abel. They were really impressed with our marble mountain and joined in the fun.
Then disaster! We heard a horrible moany voice and Arabella appeared. The gargoylz had to hide quickly. Eli turned into a snake and slithered under the compost, Theo turned into a kitten and Abel became a tree. When Arabella saw what we were doing she wanted to join in. I said no, but then she started yelling for Mum and Mum said we had to let her play.
Arabella only wanted to play to annoy us. Normally she says she’s too grown up for that sort of thing. Anyway she started bossing us about straight away. It really ruined the game especially when she demanded that she should have The Blue Wonder as she is the oldest. So I told her she couldn’t have it as it was mine. She stamped her foot and shouted and then told us that she didn’t want to play anyway and that we’d be sorry. She bent down by the tunnel to tie up her shoe and then she stalked off to the house.
Max and I cheered and the gargoylz came out of hiding. But when I sent the Blue Wonder down for its next run it didn’t come out of the tunnel. We tried to peer inside but we couldn’t see it. I was really upset. My favourite, record-breaking marble was stuck.
Lucky for me that I have a friend who can make himself tunnel-shaped. Eli turned back into a snake and shot down the tunnel to see what the problem was. He was soon out the other side with the Blue Wonder. And now we could see what had happened. There was a big lump of sticky chewing gum on my marble. Arabella must have poked the chewing gum down the tunnel with a stick when she tied up her shoe. She must have known that the next marble would run into it and then get stuck in the tunnel and that would be the end of our game.
So it’s time to plan a super trick to get Arabella back!

We’re having a film next week in school. Ben and I can’t wait. We’re hoping it’s the new Spy-Boy film – Spy-Boy and the Sharkmen from Jupiter.

We had model disaster – well almost!

By the time the gargoylz had finished helping us, our model of St Mark’s Church was blackened round the edges (Azzan), missing three windows (Neb poked his nose in) and had the top of the spire bitten off (Zack thought it was made of chocolate!)

Luckily it was big enough for Cyrus to hide in. We struggled into the classroom with it because Cyrus is very heavy. Miss Bleet told us we’d have to do it all again even though we told her it was what the church looked like just after the war when it had been bombed. Then we said that if everyone listened carefully they’d hear the choir singing inside. This was Cyrus’s cue. Ben and I just managed to get our fingers in our ears as Cyrus struck up with ‘All things bright and beautiful’ and everyone fell asleep. Ben and I went round hiding their pencils.

When they all woke up, the bell for playtime went and Miss Bleet found she’d written a very nice comment on our reports about our imaginative church – Toby had copied her writing when they were all asleep.

We’re a bit worried about next week. Our mums have said that we’re having a great outing and that it’s going to be educational!  That sounds bad!

Shortbread biscuits

You will need…
125g butter (margarine’s not half as good.)
55g caster sugar
180g plain flour
A little bit of icing sugar for sprinkling

What you do…
1. Get your tame grownup to turn the oven to 190C/375F/Gas 5.
2. Beat the butter and sugar together in a bowl until it’s all mixed.
3. Sift the flour into the mixture and stir it all until you have a thick paste.
4. Sprinkle flour on your table or work space (this is to stop the mixture sticking to the table) and put your ball of paste on to it.
5. Roll it out until it’s about 1cm thick.
6. Now cut into rectangles (about 2cm wide and 8cm long.)
7. Put your rectangles on a baking tray (with baking paper underneath to stop them sticking.) Sprinkle with a little bit of icing sugar and put into the fridge for 20 mins.
8. Bake in the oven for 15-20 minutes until they are a pale golden-brown. Put them on a wire rack to cool and then eat them before the gargoylz get their paws on them! And don’t forget to feed one to your tame grownup.

Barney says they are especially delicious if you cover them with melted cooking chocolate. Let us know how you get on.

Max and I have got homework – and it’s going to take ages! We’ve got to make a model of the church. Well it will be lot more fun with some gargoyle help!

We had the worst lesson in the history of worst lessons today at school. Mr Widget took us for country dancing out in the playground. Yuck! If that wasn’t bad enough we had to dance with girls. Double Yuck! And if that wasn’t bad enough, Mr Widget played the tunes on his bagpipes.  We had to stick cotton wool in our ears.  We wondered about asking Zack to use his pin like he did last time and pop the bagpipes but Mr Widget had wrapped them in a sort of pin-proof bag. We sent out an urgent message to the gargoylz (paper aeroplane over the church wall) and along came Jelly.

Jelly was awesome. He glooped into a bouncy ball and bounced across the playground and then shot up the bottom pipe of the bagpipes into the bag. Then Jelly began to jump about inside. Poor Mr Widget could hardly hold on to the bagpipes, they were wriggling so much. He played faster and faster until we all fell over in a heap.  Mrs Hogsbum leant out of her window and said he’d broken school rule number 855– teachers must not play musical instruments that wriggle.

Country dancing was over – result!

Got to go.  Nan’s coming round and she’s promised to bring cakes.  Toby, Neb and Eli have just arrived so I’ve got to make sure there are some left for me!

Then we heard ‘boyz!’ hissed through the letterbox and when we looked, Toby and Abel were peeping out of a bush in the front garden.  They sneaked in and Abel slipped into the lounge. The girls and our mums had just got really gooey about lovely wedding dresses – yuck – when Arabella screamed. She told them that the plant in the corner had winked at her. The others didn’t believe her but then Jessica said it was waving at her and showing its teeth. Max’s mum just turned up the volume but then my mum gave a shriek and said there was a twiggy monster in the pot. Max’s mum looked but Abel had ducked down out of sight.

The mums then came looking for us because they were sure that we’d played a trick on them.  Luckily Max and I had thought about this so we made sure we were helping his dad out in the garden. They had to agree it couldn’t have been us and that they’d all be much happier watching it back at my house so off they all went. Result! Max and I got to watch our film in his lounge in peace!  And his dad made us some popcorn. He was amazed how quickly we ate it but he didn’t realise that we had five hungry gargoylz hiding behind the couch. Once they’d heard how well the trick had gone, Barney, Neb and Theo had come to join Toby and Abel.  It was a bit of a squash.

So it was an awesome Royal Wedding day for us.

Now we’re just off to drop a wet sponge on Arabella’s head from the bedroom window.  She’s been complaining we smell because we don’t wash enough and she says she just loves washing all the time.  So we’re going to give her an extra rinse and see how she likes that.

It was awesome on Wednesday. Miss Bleet had been on holiday to Belgium and had come back with a recipe for Belgian Chocolate Cookies and she was going to get us all to make them. But then she told us the bad news. We were making them for the teachers! She had decided that it was ‘Be nice to a teacher day!’

We signalled to the gargoylz that we needed their help. When the cookies were nearly finished and the delicious smell was driving us mad, it suddenly changed to the most awful pong.  We all had to rush out into the playground and when we got back inside the cookies had vanished. Miss Bleet couldn’t work out what had happened because we’d all been with her. But we knew of course – there was no mistaking one of Barney’s bottom burps. The gargoylz were trying to get everyone out so that they could snatch the cookies. The bell rang for playtime and we were about to go over to the church wall to get our share when Miss Bleet said we had to stay in and make some more cookies for the teachers.  Disaster!

But the next lot of cookies were nearly done when suddenly the fire alarm went off and the whole school had to evacuate the building. And of course, when we got back inside, the new cookies had gone too. This time Azzan had breathed fire and set the alarm off.

We had a wonderful cookie feast after school although the gargoylz had managed to eat nearly all of them by the time we got there!

Anyway, Ben’s here with some stony friends so we’ve got a secret plan to make – get the ghastly wedding watchers out of the lounge!

Anyway, on the way home I had to get new shoes. The most boring shopping in the history of most boring shopping.  Mum picked Max and me up in the car and we went off to this old-fashioned shop where a very cross lady got loads of really horrible shoes out for me to try. I told Mum they all looked like what grandads wear but she wouldn’t listen and the shoes lady kept tutting at me.  Suddenly Max started giggling. One of the pairs of shoes jumped out of the box and started jumping about! Then another pair joined in! Mum and the shoe lady couldn’t believe their eyes! We knew just what had happened. Zack and Neb had stowed away in the car and come in to help. 

Then we heard Toby’s growly voice from under the seats.  “Disgusting! These shoez have got fleaz. That’s why they’re jumping about.”

All the other shoppers screamed and stampeded so fast for the door that they all tried to go through it together and got stuck. The cross lady had to call the fire brigade to get them free! And in the meantime, I chose some really cool shoes and the cross lady and Mum were so upset by everything that they didn’t argue. Result! 

Next Friday is April Fool’s Day. I wonder if the gargoylz have got anything planned?

We had a tunnel and a secret lab and a launch pad for our superspy rocket. But then Jessica came along. She wanted to play but she didn’t want to play Spy-boy. We didn’t want to play Spy-boy with her either but instead she wanted our base to be a princess castle! Ben and I were nearly sick.

Luckily Bart, Jelly and Neb had come to play with us. So Jelly melted down into a squidgy blob all over her shoes, Neb blended in with the cardboard and tripped Jessica up and Bart burped some spiders down her neck.  Jessica ran away screaming and so the secret base became a princess-free zone again.

Bart wanted us to tell you his best joke for this time of year but he likes two and couldn’t decide which one.  What do you think?

Q. What season is it when you’re on a trampoline?…

A. Spring-time!

Q. Can February March?…

A. No but April May!

Ben and I have to make a model of a king for history homework so we’re going to plan it out this weekend. We’ve chosen King Henry the eighth and I’ve had an awesome idea about how to do it that will be a trick as well.